Darting here and there ...
Û Tabulations by the website Baseball Think Factory of Hall of Fame votes made public so far suggest strongly that no one will be elected to Cooperstown next week. Moral: Cheaters won't prosper, but it appears the clean dudes won't, either.
Û Could be a grim ceremony in upstate New York this summer with umpire Hank O'Day, exec Jacob Ruppert and pioneer player Deacon White -- none born after 1867 -- the only ones in so far.
Û According to the early returns -- nearly 100 of the anticipated 600 ballots -- Barry Bonds and Roger Clemens will both check in at around 44 percent of the 75 percent needed. That has to bloody the socks of Curt Schilling, who's behind them at 39.
Û Not once have we ever been asked by airport security if we deserved special treatment for getting the last out of the World Series. Look, just don't mess with those people, Serg.
Û Just Another Reason the Warriors Are Better Dept.: The roles now played by Jarrett Jack and Carl Landry were played last year by Nate Robinson and Dominic McGuire. Little Nate's doing OK with Chicago, but McGuire was waived by New Orleans on Friday.
Û Kobe Bryant joined Twitter on Friday with this opening statement: "The antisocial has become social." Ah, yet another venue for Kobe to fire shots.
Û Bryant picked up more than 200,000 Twitter followers less than three hours after joining. At that rate, he will have caught Stephen Curry by the end of the day.
Û Bryant's comments about the Lakers being an "old damn team" were pretty hilarious but not as hilarious as the nickname "Antique Road Show" that's making the rounds in L.A.
Û Personally, we prefer "Slowtime."
Û Two familiar names linked in separate news events this week: P.J. Carlesimo, back in the NBA head coaching saddle in Brooklyn, and Latrell Sprewell, arrested for disorderly conduct on New Year's Eve in Milwaukee (reportedly for playing music too loud).
Û Replay Crybaby of the Week: Colorado basketball coach Tad Boyle. Your team blew a 17-point lead, coach, and you're whimpering about a replay that appeared to be correct?
Û What is it about Colorado teams that can't get the final shot off on time? The Denver Nuggets had the same scenario at Oracle about a month ago. To wit, George Karl said absolutely nothing about the integrity of replay.
Û Hard to believe Chip Kelly would prefer Cleveland, Buffalo or Philadelphia over Arizona. It's even more unbelievable the Cardinals only seem mildly intrigued by Kelly after Oregon's Fiesta Bowl romp in their own stadium. That place hasn't seen that much action since Kurt Warner retired.
Û A Pac-12 NFC West with Jim Harbaugh, Pete Carroll and Kelly would be something to behold. And hey, even Jeff Fisher played at USC.
Û Of course, it would be so much easier if the NFL just added Eugene, Ore., as an expansion franchise.
Û Speaking of coaching changes, we also have Philly cheese transitioning to K.C. barbecue. Quite a smooth move for Andy Reid.
Û Not going anywhere: Stanford's David Shaw, and likely a happier man than any of them.
Û NFL playoffs fascinating fact: Aaron Rodgers is the only quarterback in the NFC field who's ever won a postseason game ... not counting a backup named Alex Smith.
Û If Billy Cundiff's the option, most Niners fans would likely prefer sticking with David Akers. But you wonder how many of those same folks would prefer luring Joe Nedney away from Comcast SportsNet.
Û Our annual disastrous foray into picking playoff winners, Week 1: Ravens, Texans, Packers, Seahawks. If you know the history, you'll bet the other way on three of four. But which three?
Û Drowned out in the wake of a Rose Bowl win: Stanford-UConn women's hoops. Ouch.
Û Jose Canseco briefly flirted this week about running for mayor of Toronto. "I do want to run," Canseco wrote in an email to the Toronto Star. "It's a good cause, and I know I can do well. But I am not a citizen so it's a moot point. Unless the rules are different."
Û This is a relief to us Jose fans. He can now focus on one of his other New Year's projects, launching "Ponce de Canseco," which he describes as a "real anti-aging drink." Hope it works, because life would be so much poorer without this guy.
Û Finally, you have to admire someone secure enough in his own accomplishments to stop at 399 wins. Good luck, De La Salle legend Bob Ladouceur, in whatever your future pursuits may be. Great coach, better man.
Contact Carl Steward at email@example.com. More darting on Twitter @stewardsfolly.