Darting here and there ...

Û The Giants' slide has been so bad that they had to go for an exorcism with a team of Padres.

Û The Giants thought they had solved their batting-out-of-order problem. Then they batted Brandon Belt third (0 for 8, five whiffs).

Û As the G-men collectively collapsed, it became fairly clear Madison Bumgarner didn't get the meltdown memo.

Û At least the Giants are still No. 1 in something -- Buster Posey jerseys sold. Cha-Ching!

Û A fan walked up to Posey to ask for an autograph recently, but the person wearing the jersey turned out to be Colin Kaepernick.

Û ESPN's Ron Jaworski rates Kaepernick 11th among the best NFL quarterbacks. Jaws must think Kaepernick really does play for the Miami Dolphins now.

Û Cut Kaep some slack. At least he didn't wear the Miami lid in his nude ESPN the Magazine poses.

Û Fastest time to first base this week, Bartolo Colon or Derek Jeter? We might have to give the nod to "Boltolo."

Û Nice to see Yoenis Cespedes in the All-Star game Home Run Derby. Maybe he'll rediscover his home run stroke (no home runs in the past 16 games for the A's, and two in the past 29, both in the same game).

Û Things Only We Notice File: The A's called up guys named Gray and Green this week to don the Oakland road uniforms of the same colors.

Û Tough break for Yasiel Puig. Guess those 50 million Last Man votes didn't get out of Cuba. And he lost to a guy named Freeman. Free man. Oh, forget it.

Û More name game stuff: A guy named Homer has two no-hitters in the past year and a guy named Balfour has 41 straight saves. Maybe Bob Walk should contemplate coming out of retirement.

Û One good thing about possibly building a ballpark at the Port of Oakland. The cranes are already in place.

Û Anyone who thinks that ballpark is going to happen under this A's ownership has probably been drinking too much port.

Û If only San Jose Arena had as many championship banners hanging from its rafters as sponsor names over the years (sorry, we're not counting the SaberCats, or it ruins the item).

Û So it's SAP Center now, just in time for the SAP tennis tournament's exile to Brazil or Memphis or wherever they moved it.

Û We absolutely love Andre Iguodala, but between Jarrett Jack and Richard Jefferson, the Warriors have an awful lot of J's to replace.

Û No, Andre, we're not factoring in Jesus Curry. Remember how much trouble that caused for John Lennon.

Û As for Andris Biedrins, he had no J's in his name or his game. Good jriddance.

Û David Lee's hip flexor surgery must have gone incredibly well. He's playing in the American Century celebrity golf event at Lake Tahoe next week -- hopefully, not with Charles Barkley.

Û Also playing in the event, possibly in the exiled Bay Area quarterback twosome: Alex Smith and Carson Palmer, both rocking different caps now.

Û Steph Curry and Ray Allen will play in the golf tournament as well. Can't wait to see them in the closest-to-the-hole shootout.

Û If he could come back from the dead and make a comparison now, we're not sure Sam Houston would have picked Houston over L.A.

Û Let's see ... Moe Howard, Curly Howard, Shemp Howard, and now Dwight Howard. We always knew there were more than just The Three Stooges.

Û How You Should Know You Need To Get A Life Dept.: You're watching all the summer league games on NBATV. Or even just one.

Û A more notable TV listing coming up on ESPN Classic: the 1984 All-Star game from Candlestick Park (July 22, 11 a.m.). Hopefully they show the dude holding the flag being lifted off the ground by the wind.

Û Worst alphabet soup in sports: CONCACAF. Yes, we're watching the Gold Cup soccer, but after all these years, we still have no idea what all that garble stands for.

Û And then in the U.S. match against Belize, somebody misspelled the name on the back of Chris Wondolowski's jersey. Wonderful.

Û Rex Ryan ran with the bulls in Pamplona? Fitting for a family that has been running bull for decades.

Û Amnesty for World Peace. There's just something at war in that announcement.

Û Finally, on his 92nd birthday, we hope Jake LaMotta had some raging gruel.

Contact Carl Steward at csteward@bayareanewsgroup.com. More darting on Twitter @stewardsfolly.