DEAR JOAN:

As a very young child my grandparents always took us to veterans' programs, and one Christmas when I was 6 or 7, I was assigned to recite "The Candy Cane." It started out "The Candy Cane hung on the tree, it measured a yard and a quarter."

If you can find it for me, I have promised to recite it at our Christmas program for Retired State Employees. You are my only hope of finding it.

Shirley B., Hayward

Dear Shirley:

I found this in a very old publication, and it doesn't list the author, when it was written or even if this is the entire poem. But hopefully, this will be enough to make you the star of the Christmas program.

"The candy cane hung on the tree/It measured a yard and a quarter/It hung there by its ribbon red/Like a horsey held by its halter/But soon it fell and broke in bits/Yet Christmas fun ne'er ceases/For isn't a candy cane as good/And better, too, in pieces."

Dear Joan:

I'm looking for a song that could have been in one of the "Road" movies made by Bing Crosby, Bob Hope and the lovely Dorothy Lamour.

Is there any hope of your locating the pretty song "Beside a waterfall, I am calling you-ooo-ooo-ooo?" The first line is all that I can remember.

For sometime our daughter was a full-time teacher of English and drama at South San Francisco High School. We, as grandparents, had the joy of taking care of our two precious grandchildren during

I used to play a game with my grandson where I would sing that song. Just recently he tried, unsuccessfully to locate this song. He said he found a similar waterfall song, but it's the not the same. We would be delighted if you could find the lyrics of this old song. I wish I could remember more of the song.

Sally A., San Mateo

Dear Sally:

I remember the Bob Hope connection, too, although I think it might have been in "Paleface" or "Son of Paleface." And I think the song you're thinking of is "Indian Love Song," made famous by Nelson Eddy and Jeanette McDonald.

Here are the lyrics.

"I am calling you/I will answer too/That means I offer my love to you/If you refuse it I will be blue/And waiting all alone

But if when you hear my love call ringing clear/And I hear your love call echoing so near/Then I know our love will come true/You'll belong to me/I'll belong to you/When I will call our love will come true/You'll belong to me/I'll belong to you

Dear Joan:

Back in the early days of "Masterpiece Theatre," they produced two short series based on Balzac's books: "Père Goriot" and "Cousin Bette."

These started a love of Balzac that made me go out and buy a complete collection of 23 hard-bound books at Holme's Bookstore and I spent many of my ski bumming nights at Tahoe reading them by a fire.

"Cousin Bette" has been released on DVD, probably due to the presence of a young, sexy Helen Mirren, but I have not been able to find "Père Goriot."

I was hoping that you, with your resources, could find out if it was ever put on VHS or DVD.

Mad John the Juggler

Dear Mad John:

This will probably only make you madder, but it does not appear that "Père Goriot" has been released on video. I couldn't find it in the PBS store or through the BBC, and I didn't even locate bootleg copies.